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To: The U.S. Army
I volunteer to help the U.S. Army find its missing $6.5 trillion
Please allow us to visit your facilities and to conduct unimpeded inspections until we determine exactly where the unaccounted for $6.5 trillion ended up -- the $6.5 trillion that you said in the report linked below you just can't locate. We are willing to do this on a contingency basis, accepting as payment a 0.0001% finder's fee each.
Why is this important?
$30 billion a year could end starvation and hunger worldwide.
$11 billion a year could provide clean drinking water to everyone who needs it.
All the green energy projects ever envisioned that could preserve life on earth would collectively cost significantly less than this pocket change of yours that has gone missing.
We realize you didn't drop it in the yard with your keys somewhere, that you SPENT it on things you don't really want to go into details about with us, even though it was our money to begin with. Nonetheless, we'll help you identify exactly where it all went. It shouldn't be hard if you give us proper access.
Here's your report on the unaccounted for money:
How it will be delivered
To the U.S. Army.